Thursday, January 29, 2015

Why Don't You Get A Job & Go To Work?

Just the other day, I heard it!
"Why don't you get a job and go to work?"
I was caught off guard.
 Since I only had a few seconds to respond, all I could do was bite my tongue.  
Later, thoughts raced through my head like,
 "Why don't you mind your own business?"
"What do you think I do all day?"
"I do work! In fact, I have more "jobs" than you!"
I was provoked, to say the least.
Why did this person assume that I needed a "job" in the first place. Honestly, I think some people just like to be irritating and condescending!  Some people think that all families should fit into the same mold, which is exactly like their own.  This person has such an elevated sense of self worth that he (I'll just use "he") loves to rattle out his opinions in matters that do not concern him. 
I usually don't feel like I have to explain to anyone how I spend my days, but since I decided to write this post, here it goes.
I hear my husband get up around 6:00am.  I stay in bed and pray for a while.  My husband likes his "alone time" with the Lord each morning at the kitchen table, so I wait and begin stirring just before he leaves for work.  At this time, my new homeschooler arrives.  I have started homeschooling/tutoring my friend's daughter.  From 8:30 until lunch, I am busy teaching math, checking papers, explaining prepositional phrases, washing dishes, explaining molecules, running back and forth to the laundry room, helping calculate interest compounded daily, finding greatest common factors and least common multiples, folding laundry,sweeping, explaining indirect objects and direct objects,  feeding chickens, collecting eggs, teaching a Bible lesson, cooking, and wishing the bathroom would just clean itself!  I find time to check my blog in between or during lunch.  I am constantly watching the clock because I leave at 3:00 everyday to pick up my friend's daughter. Some days I also watch my 3 year old grandson (my son's little boy). When I arrive back home, I begin cooking supper while juggling other tasks.  After supper, we usually have our family Bible reading time, and on Wednesday nights we go to church.  Before I know it, it's after 10:00.  Some nights I have to pile all the school books up on the dining room table and assign a week or two worth of lessons.  I usually don't get to sleep until way after midnight. I'm not in my 20s or 30s anymore!  I get exhausted! 
So what was that question?
 Oh yea,
"Why don't you get a job and go to work?"
That question just boils my goose!
I guess it would have been a lot easier(on me) if I had let the government raise my children.  I could have just sent them off to public school where they would have missed out on a Christ-centered education, Sound Doctrine, and moments that nothing could ever replace. I thank God that we have just about made it to the finish line.  My daughter has a little over 3 months left before our family's homeschool journey comes to an end.  However, I may still be tutoring my friend's daughter, and perhaps one or two more.  I still have a noble calling as a mother to my grown children.  I am still a wife and mother with a home to clean, errands to run, clothes to wash, finances to manage, a family(and friends) to cook for, and a grandson that needs my love and attention. I also do a lot for my parents. 
I am a Keeper of the Home!
  I am needed,
 overwhelmed at times,
 tired,
 blessed,
sometimes stressed
and
loved!
God enables me with the strength I need each day.  I don't punch a clock, and I don't receive a paycheck each Friday, 
but guess what....
I still work! 
 It is a work of love, and I know that no amount of money could satisfy me or my family more than what we have each day.  Yes, I have worked away from home during the past 15+ years that I have homeschooled.  I worked long weekends (36 hours) and was usually home during the week, but that made me miss family time every weekend and church.  How could the person who asked me, 
"Why don't you get a job and go to work?" think that my work at the hospital could ever benefit my family more than being a stay-at-home-mom during this time of our life? We were no richer when I worked!  In fact, God has blessed us and we are better off financially and spiritually now than we have ever been.  Don't get me wrong, we still live week to week.  I am not ashamed to say that!  What's more, we love seeing how God comes through for us! We have our daily needs, and God blesses us with extras too.  We don't desire a huge bank account. Our Heavenly Father owns it all anyway, and we trust Him for all our needs.  No banker could ever give us more, interest free!  
 I have A Great Work At Home!  
The Role of Mothers should be celebrated in today's society, instead it is mocked. (Read the above links.  If you enjoy this post, I think you will enjoy them.)
The fact remains that some people will never understand what it means for a mother to be in the home full-time. I'm not going to compare the SAHM to the moms who work, because we all have our own opinions.  It can cause heated arguments.  I wouldn't want to sound condemning towards working mothers, nor would I want to come off sounding goody goody.  My heart goes out to all mothers and families.  Satan is working hard at destroying  families.  If you feel strongly about becoming a SAHM, pray about it. Keep in mind that if you do become a SAHM, you will more than likely get asked the question,
 "Why don't you get a job and go to work?"
When this happens, try to be polite. 
Give your anger to the Lord and ask Him to dispose of it for you.
Thanks for letting me vent.
I feel much better now, and God has replaced my frustration with forgiveness and love.

But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine...
The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness...
That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:1-5

40 comments:

  1. Amen!!!!!! I'm also a non- working stay home homeschooling mom that wears many titles. Thank you for taking stand for a Godly home. The way the Lord intended it to be. You are blessed.

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    1. Thanks for your supportive comment. Have a very blessed day!

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  2. Chris, loved you post. Motherhood and homemaking ARE the most important jobs in the world. Thanks for sharing and for encouraging other young and not-so-young moms. Thank you, too, for featuring my post from last week and for your linkup. Blessings!

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    1. Thanks for the very nice comment. I was honored to feature your post in this week's link up.
      God bless.

      Delete
  3. Amen!!! You preach it sister!!!...:)

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  4. Bless you. We all have our place in the body and are placed so in His wisdom. God be with you.

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  5. It truly is a joy and blessing to be a Keeper of the home and it's quite rewarding and fulfilling. I am grateful I get to keep the home and prepare meals for my sweet husband and I am thankful for the opportunity to be able to bewith my son, teaching him, caring for him and watching him grow :)

    The Lord has a will for each one of us and we need to remember that eveyone's life is different from our own - beautiful post, Chris. Have a lovely weekend!

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    1. Thank you Stephanie! I appreciate your very lovely comment.
      God bless.

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  6. Thank you for sharing this! being a home maker is a really unpopular job nowadays! It breaks my heart that people don't take it seriously, and that more don't see it as a 'job' Thank you for encouraging us home makers out there! I enjoyed this post!!

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    1. I am glad that you were encouraged by this post. Thanks for your nice comment.
      God bless.

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  7. Thanks for sharing the fact that SAHM really do *work* each day!! :) It is time for the stereotypical, Bon-Bon eating, soap opera watching mom, to be dumped and let the truth of the matter shine...

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    1. Amen! Thanks for the supportive comment.
      God bless.

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  8. Great post, thanks for sharing at Good Morning Mondays. As wives and mothers we have the greatest job of all. Blessings

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    1. Yes, it is a job, and it is also the greatest.
      God bless.

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  9. I've recently been a stay-at-home mom. I'm happy no one has plagued me yet with these questions...

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    1. Let's hope they don't! More than likely you will have a few people question you because it isn't the "way of the world' today. Just remember that it is the most important work in the world, and you indeed have a noble calling!
      God bless.

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  10. Love this! I quit my job a few months ago and as much as I loved it and would go back in a heartbeat, I wouldn't want to change the daily love and time I have with my little one! Unfortunately, the criticism I get aren't from strangers but rather from family and friends who think I do absolutely nothing all day. I wish I did nothing! But I can't turn off a three year old (and she said she quit nap time, so I really don't get a break until my husband comes home)! Thank you for the reminder that I'm not "in it" for me, my needs or others, but hers and what is absolute best for my family and I. Staying at home has always been a personal choice and one that my hubs, my little one and I won't regret. God Bless!

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    1. It is important to learn, with God's help, to not dwell on what others say. You can arm yourself with a polite and to-the-point answer that may, temporarily, silence critics. However, there will always be "those people" who seem to enjoy getting into your business. I believe that deep down most people know that it's the right thing to do. Maybe they are not happy with their own choices. Prov. 15 A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright.
      God bless your decision to be a stay-at-home- mom!

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  11. This is so on my heart today! Just last night my husband was asking my daughter what she was going to do when she grew up. She said she was going to get married and stay home with her babies <3

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    1. What a lovely response to his question! It should be encouraged! I am glad you liked my post.
      God bless.

      Delete
  12. It's amazing what people are willing to say. I get it every once in a while, but, like you, I tend to bite my tongue. Thanks for submitting to the HomeAcre hop. Heidi @ Pint Size Farm

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    1. Yes it is amazing what people say. Lord, help me to always have a soft answer. lol
      God bless.

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  13. You are doing a wonderful thing by being there for your friends and family! People who say otherwise just don't understand...It's people like that that I don't even know how to, nor desire to explain myself to... Keep up the good work!

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    1. I appreciate your comment and your support. Yes, sometimes I don't know how to respond nor do I desire to either. Maybe next time I will act as if I didn't even hear it and begin talking about something else.
      God bless.

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  14. I stayed home most of the time our children were in school, and at times I cared for children in my home. Just enough child care money to provide toward our weekly grocery shopping.

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    1. It is a job. I don't have any extra income right now because I am helping a dear friend who has been in the hospital for months, but I may advertise as a homeschool tutor before the next school term. I am still thinking about it though. My daughter will be finished in May and that will be the last of our own to finish school.
      God bless.

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  15. Thank you so much for this. It always bothers me a little when someone says, "Oh, you just work at home." As if it's nothing. Homeschooling six children with a preschooler and toddler underfoot is not nothing. Especially when you throw in cooking, cleaning and training my children to do cooking and cleaning. It's hard work with no extra pay for overtime, no scheduled breaks (even when you try to use the bathroom as a break they always find you), no sick days. But I would trade it for anything. Thank you for this post.

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    1. I am glad this post was able to encourage you. Keep up the good WORK.
      God bless.

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  16. Your graphic says it all, there are not enough hands for a days works and I agree when people say, "oh you just work at home", I'd like to say, come meet he crew, you are welcome to come try it sometime!!! Then maybe they would not think that way. I admire anyone that chooses to home-school with running a household.

    I too, like many cared for other children to earn extra money for clothes and groceries and so I could stay home.

    Thank you for sharing on the Oh My Heartsie Girl WW this week.
    Have a great weekend.
    Karren

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    1. Thanks for your supportive comment and for hosting such lovely link ups!
      God bless.

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  17. How very rude for someone to have said that you need to get a job. I applaud you for standing up for yourself and your beliefs and hope you continue to do so!

    Thank you for sharing this post on the SHINE Blog Hop!

    xx
    Lysa
    Welcome to My Circus
    Co-host #SHINEbloghop 2/5

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    1. Thanks Lysa. I appreciate your supportive comment. Thanks for hosting the blog shops!
      God bless.

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  18. Love this post! I have ran into similar situations and really dislike that fact that people judge other families decisions.Thanks for sharing!

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  19. It'd be nice if people could support each other instead of tearing each other down! I've been both at-home mom and working mom, and believe me there isn't an 'easy' option, and both get 'you're doing it wrong' comments from people not minding their own business. Thanks for linking up to Awesome Life Friday! We will be pinning this post - can't wait to see what you're sharing this week!

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  20. Oh, it's work! It's unfortunate that some in the outside world do not see it as such. Way to keep your priorities straight and lean on HIM!

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  21. As a homeschooling, no-working, stay-at-home mom of two, I can identify. I work too! A LOT! My boss is THE boss and I'm accountable to Him and Him alone.

    Thanks for sharing and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop.

    Wishing you a lovely day.
    xoxo

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  22. I hate that question! I remember being asked that when my daughter was about a year old. My response? "God gave me a job when he gave me this little girl!"

    #SHINEhop

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  23. I have 3 small kids and wonder how people have time to do anything else when they homeschool! That is such a huge and valuable commitment. Wish more people lived by The Golden Rule these days! Thanks for sharing with Small Victories Sunday Linkup last week. Pinning to our linkup board and hope you joined us again this weekend.

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